Tag Archive | family

A Fair Day For A Wedding

Life has never offered something that comes with rainbows and chocolate rivers, but we are not foolish to dream such joys. The curveballs that are tossed our way can be difficult to connect with, but in the end, they offer a moment of contemplation that few take advantage of. A simple concept of the curveball that is taught to a young baseball player is to relax and wait for it to float. Once it floats, the bat will crush it. I believe that this analogy has reflected in life recently.

This weekend, my best friend will be getting married. He has been in my life for well over twenty years and has left a remarkable influence on my life. I received the invitation from his bride-to-be about six months ago. I, of course, was in the middle of a long stretch of unemployment, so I was unsure that I would be able to attend. It was a little unsettling to know that I would miss his wedding, but I sent my regards at the time.  Through the summer, my spouse and I used all my skills in creative financing, also known as the house budget, to find a way to reach this wedding. At the end of August, it appeared that we might have saved and pinched enough out of the frugal life of the unemployed that I would find a way to San Diego for the wedding.

I was so excited that I spent some time looking for the correct attire and finding the travel plans to fit the budget.  I was not concerned with a job interfering. My spouse’s part time job was open and the matter was set. Then, the curveball left the pitcher’s hand and I knew that this was going to truly be a test of resolve and patience.

Two weeks ago, I was offered a job that started this week including a training period into this Friday night.  I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.  We were going to miss a big day in my friend’s life and he would have to celebrate this turn in his life without us. So, we will have to wish him the best in the days to come and hope that once the year settled down that we can all meet under our own circumstances.

On that note, we will express our feelings and sentiments to him, his new bride, and all the guests there to celebrate with him. To our best friend and his bride-to-be, we wish you the best in life. It is a wish that can only be given in word until the time comes when we meet again. This day will be marked in your lives forever and know that this part of your family is with you always.

The curveball may come to anyone when they least expect it, but don’t fret about missing it. Let it come and wait patiently until it gently floats over the plate. Give it a swing and find the sweet spot. No matter what…you will find a wonderful life on the other side.

crudus animus


The Family Setting

I have spent the last few days enjoying a little time with my family.  The teenagers are starting to find more and more freedom until they will be eventually on their own.  That is a few years from now, but I like to think that we are getting the message across as to what is important and where their values will be. In a way, I am quite please with them and do not really look forward to losing them to the world.  I like to tease that I have plans for their rooms, but I will miss them more than I like to admit.

This brings me to a simple thought on the idea of family. As people on the planet Earth, we are filled with the many standards of what defines a family and what it means. Of course, the structure is usually built around a foundation of two people. They are the root of the family setting. In days past, the acceptable family was a father and mother who each saw to different duties in the house. The father played the part of the bread winner, while the mother saw to the home and childcare as necessary. This status quo family has been evolving in the recent fashion as our progressive society looks to find more and more freedoms that fit into the lifestyles of individuals.

I have been very fascinated by one side feeling a threat to the ideal family values being posed by people who have non-traditional lifestyles. I use such phrasing to make it understandable that this is the mainstream view of society, but I am a strong believer that we are each responsible for our lives. Our open minds will learn from past mistakes. My question is the redefining of family settings.  We can no longer turn to the cookie-cutter family with a father and mother who fill roles.  Do we have a need to restructure our family values to understand more of the world and those from different backgrounds?

The answer is simple.  We need to break this oppressive status quo in all areas especially the family unit. Its purpose is to prepare children for their lives in the world and ready them with the foundations of beliefs that are their choice. Traditions and customs are part of the molding, but we must leave them open to the liberality and cognizance of their minds.  This is not something that only a husband and wife can teach.  It is something that should be ideal for any married couple, single parent, or same-sex couple. Establishing this core value is the family value that I endorse and encourage in my family.  It has opened my children to extraordinary events and insights into the world around them.

For some, this might be old news, but for me, this has been a great turn in comparison to my own upbringing.  I believe that this is the reason that I often fight for the ideals of a progressive thought style.  It is very exciting to have each of my children grow into adults who will be able to make solid judgments that are not filled with the heavy baggage that often closes the mind to new ways of thinking. I can honestly say that they are becoming free of intolerance and ignorance.

With that said, I believe that we all should take time to reevaluate ourselves and remember that we are all still from the same family…the human race. Allow evolution to proceed and crawl from the bog of archaic ways that suffocate our minds.  Open it up and fill it with what is needed to make the world better.

One more to go and I will be hitting a goal that I set long ago.  My fiftieth post is on its way.

crudus animus

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