I wanted to use this moment to express a few thoughts that have been floating around in my mind. In recent weeks, I have come to realize that I have actually found some good friends who are not just there during the good times. I have been given a great amount of good things in my life, but friends have been limited in number. The friends that I have held dear have been great and long-lasting. It was their influence on me that helped change some of my unsavory qualities. I still struggle with tendencies of less-than-positive view and a slight trend toward narcissism. Of course, I like to think that all of us have a moment or two where we are self-centered and self-serving. All of this is coming into the light as I settle into a new job and new responsibilities. I am the new guy again.
Confidence in one’s abilities is not always a bad thing in those moments when it must be used to defend a position or offer a suggestion. I am often finding myself pulling back from speaking like a know-it-all. A great talent is not always appreciated and some resent it. This brought me to realize that perhaps there was a better way to handle such a situation.
As I stated in a previous blog, I was going to begin reading a few books. A couple did not grab me immediately, so they were put to the side for a time. To be honest, reading a novel, for me, is something that fits into the right time in life. So, I moved through a few books and found that I was back to reading the Game of Thrones, which I had put off. At first glance, the writing was skilled with developing great twists of intrigue and characters. I felt that it was lacking a great amount of description to the world that I was used to. However, I have found it to be enjoyable, and I continue to read.
Back to my point about handling a situation with some humility and grace so resentment is not borne by others, I found that one particular character in the book to have a similar situation. The bastard Jon Snow, who comes from his father’s house with training and skill with the sword, enters into the service of a fighting troop who protects the realm from the forces beyond the Wall. It is a harsh life and they are sworn off a life of family. As Jon enters the training, it is very clear that he is capable of defending himself and defeating his classmates in large groups. However, he is isolated by those that he has defeated and embarrassed. It becomes even harder as the trainer brings his own ridicule into the situation.
It is at this moment that Jon is given some advice that perhaps he should remove that haughty nature from his confidence. It is this quality that the other recruits and instructors are resenting in Jon. I don’t think that I would have puzzled it out as well as Jon, but he turned from beating his classmates to teaching them with the skills that he has. He goes from loner to a distinct leader of the recruits to the point that they follow him, even against the wishes of the instructor.
In this, I considered the new position that I was placed in at my new job and remembered the true leadership that is found in being a mentor while being the leader. I have used this technique in the past, but it has been some time since it was on my mind. It has drawn me from the darkness that I often faced during the last few months.
It was inspired by a novel, enhanced by friends, and used by a person seeking to become a better part of this world. I count those here that read and follow me as part of that support. When I was lost, all of you were there for me. My thanks to all.
By the way, my frequency may not increase entirely as the job levels off and the coming of the great month of November. November holds a few things that should be excellent. It is the month of NaMoWriMo and I will be making my second attempt to writing a novel of 50,000 words in a month. Last year, I finished the novel in January, so I am trying for a better run this time. I will likely update the blog as I can.
Also, my wedding anniversary comes toward the end of the month and it will be eighteen years, so it will be exciting. So, for now, I need to catch up on my favorite blogs and enjoy what all of you are writing.
The last few days have left me time to think and consider the options for the future. Much to my surprise, I have recently found my way into a new job. After nine months of job searching, I stumbled into this one as a friend recommended it to me and I quickly earn the position in the initial interview. The point that captured the job had nothing to do with my work experience beyond my ability to represent a viewpoint to the public. It was my strength of character, and possibly, it was my charisma.
A bit of charisma can go a long way with some people? It is a trait that I have never truly considered to be part of my strengths. I have a long-winded way of explaining matters or positions as my blog is evident of, but it would seem that the years have helped me shape this into a quality of charisma. I have always idolized those with great poise and charisma. The true sign of confidence rises to the top and appears as arrogance at times. I am impressed by those that enjoy this natural quality.
Most of the time, I present a confident manner. If it is a matter that my beliefs are settled in, I will quickly come to the front of the argument or stance with a very strong case. If it is a matter where my opinion is well-defined, I have the fortress ready to defend with topical quips and fact-based evidence. I have no doubt to hide from, so I speak my mind to the point of stubbornness. It often has to be tempered by my spouse.
That said I have had other times when I am not so confident in my stance or opinion, so I have to contemplate the information. Or I have no opinion on the matter. For some, I have noticed that they will use their charisma to inspire an answer from others or place themselves in the middle of the topic with a leaning to the proper side. I like to emulate this quality when I can and dream about the time when I can do it more often than not.
So, it brings me to my thoughts about the new avenue that this job brings before me. I am like most people when it comes to the new, unknown path. It is exciting to explore and present a new aspect of your personality. These new people have a chance to see what most may never have a chance to see. These new people have must to teach you. I have so much to learn, and it has a great potential.
As we travel down the road, I can say that life is never a guarantee. Success or failure may come, but it is the pieces of the overall picture that matter the most. My year has been marked by a long drought of employment and a chance to recover myself from the cynicism of the workplace. Although I don’t think that I have burned it all away, I have found that I am able to use what I learned. I have broken down and taken my mind apart to the base parts and reconstructed what I believe can become a viable piece for the future.
I am eager to see what happens with the new engine in the car. I believe that anyone can find their way out from dark times. It takes a bit of charisma and a lot of support from those around you that really care. I include those that follow this blog in that sentiment.